DECEMBER

Since its already been a month of not updating, I'd like to say hello. Sorry for being a bit random cause it's 2:37 am and I can't sleep. 

It is christmas break!! Sadly that january 6 is near and how I am pissed off as I typed this sentence but i don't want to erase it because i just want it to be a part of this post. Anyway, 2014 is coming up and yeah january 6.. Damn it. 2013 will come to an end soon and hooray 2014. 2013 was somehow a mix of "i love my life" and "i hate my life" moments. I think everyone does. But yeah I am hoping for a great year ahead as 2014 is coming up and fuck the bullshits. 2014 is college year and speaking of college, we failed the upcat. Yes my twin and I. For some odd reason, i don't want to study in UP anyway and maybe i was affected the fact that i failed is because i fail to fulfill my parents expectations. There are 3 exams left and I pray to God that we ace the three or the two or the one university/ies. WAG LANG ZERO :( 

I bought Veronica Roth's Divergent series. The Divergent was out of stock so I bought the Insurgent and Allegiant. Sakit sa bulsa! Hahaha. I read Divergent on the ipad and i finished it less than a week for the sake of reading the actual books. It was an awesome book! I recommend to add it to your reading list. No regrets. :) 

That pretty much sums up of what's happening as of the moment and goodnight! x 

What's happening in my life right now

• so i got my report card last saturday

• got an average of 90!! super unexpected yet super thankful :-) 

• dad bought me an iphone 5 hehe 

• it was actually my request tho if i got a 90 

• previous post >> 

• letting the feelings go

• i have been really tired lately though i didn't do anything super tiring 

• except studying 

• uninspired to blog at tumblr croo

• life's a bit boring 

• nothing really much exciting

Don't kill my vibes

Did I ever think that he was worth the risk? Of course not and glad that I didn't take any. Kasi puta, nagbirthday na ako at siya pa rin naaalala ko. I even hoped that he'd greet me or something but no, he didn't. WHY DO I HAVE TO CARE SO FUCKING MUCH ABOUT THAT PERSON? Parang akala mo may pakelam siya sakin. Ilang beses ko na sinabi at tinatak sa isip ko na "Wag mo na siya isipin. Pabayaan mo na, wala naman siyang kwenta eh." EH BAT GANON? PARANG HINDI UMAALIS SA PUSO KO NA I STILL LIKE HIM ASDGSJFJKLDJI. Like pa ba yon o iba? Hindi ko rin maintindihan sarili ko eh.. kung bat pa ako nagpapakatanga dito sa nararamdaman ko na ayaw ko na damdamin. All it gives me is annoyance and bullshit. Naiinis ako sa nangyari samin eh. Don't worry it's not sex ayt? Hahaha. Nagpapaka-sweet siya tas ngayon parang walang nangyari. Akala ko ako lang, yun pala sa iba niya rin ginagawa yun tas sabi sakin ng kaibigan ko "Normal sa kanya yun" BAKA MALANDI BAKA LANG. Why does this have to happen so sudden? Did I even deserve to be in pain or in a state where I get pissed off when I see that person? Kaya ayoko humantong sa ganito when I'm attached to someone, I'm getting my hopes up and disappointments will ruin the scene. I didn't liked him or lead into something that I can't handle on purpose. Hay life. I'll be better next time and I hope that next time is not near from today. Years maybe? idk, wag lang ngayon because I have much things to take care of other than this fucking sawi sa pag-ibig thing. 

Incoming birthday

We'll be leaving for Thailand tomorrow. Glad that we booked the flights on the right time because fri-mon will be our foundation day. Turning 16 on sunday!!!! That is pretty much the reason why we made this trip.. to celebrate our birthday. I have a twin brother so its our. Anyway, I felt uncomfortable again as I answered my friends' question "San kayo punta?" I am thinking a proper lie so that I am not trying to be arrogant and be told "RK niyo." It turned out they knew that we are going to Thailand because they knew I was lying. Yeah I got the response that I don't want to hear... "Yaman niyo." That's the thing why I don't want answering questions where it would actually lead to something I don't want to happen. I don't want to be treated as a different person all because we can afford those expensive stuff.

Well it has been an awesome year to be 15. Though there were stuff that were difficult and my immaturity that I've turned into sometimes..  but I am thankful that I passed through that. Now that I am entering a new age, I'll be wiser, mature enough and optimistic. I am sick of thinking and caring too much. Cheers! 

Yolanda

I think the whole world knows that the Philippines is in state of calamity right now. News report says that Yolanda will be the strongest typhoon of the year..of course I am scared as fuck. Here at my city, there's no heavy rains as of the moment but it is super windy. Still, I am scared. Tacloban city must have been the dangerous city of all. The rain is non-stop, elecricity and telephone lines were cut off, houses were destroyed. There's a part inside me where I am feeling blessed because I didn't or will be experience that and at the same time, I feel sorry for myself because there's nothing that I can do to help them but pray and pray.

102713

• woke up around 7 am cause of red days :(

• can't sleep anymore

• no wifi fuuu 

• bread for breakfast 

• started converting videos from avi to mp4 ugh 

• my parents' newly renovated room is so perf :( 

• recording myself, ranting haha

• lazy to take a shower 

• took a shower anyway

• off to qc 

• lunch and chitchat with relatives

• gb! 

• fixing my laptop's screen ranges up to 10k-25k wtf no way joze wag na lang

• gelatone 

• ace hardware 

• homeeee

Today was pretty much productive. Energy drained 

Break is near

Sembreak is finally next week! I have been waiting for that much-needed-rest feeling ever since school starts. Nah just kidding, but seriously. Bought ATL's Don't Panic: It's longer now. Great songs :D 

Exam week.. sounds like petiks week. I don't feel the exams tbh. Kala ko ako lang, lahat pala kami hahahaha. Nothing really much happened. Sorry if I mention Karl too much. I'll stop now. 

Tough

I wasn't really expecting that senior life could be this difficult. It is required for us to have an 80 hour parish involvement in which cases we have to complete all the hours until december and fuck I have 75 hours left. I am really not active when church is involved to be completely honest. I don't mean that I'm an anti and I praise God with all my might everytime. If the school could've announced it earlier like last year, then all of us are done. They didn't offered any LSS last year, just this year. Our school policies gotten a lot strict but they are always asking us to pay this and that para daw sa "school" they could've said "WALA NA KAMING PERA" than to keep on collecting money from students who are clueless on where will the money go or something.

091013

Hey guiseeee. No school tomorrow! Much needed break. So we didn't do anything much in school today. Crafting in arts that's all. What made my day was this guy over here named Karl. Yesterday, I asked him to do an arm wrestling with me because I keep on convincing him that I beat my seat mate (not really haha) idk I just thought that he is weak and stuff but hell, he is not. IN JUST 5 SECONDS HE BEAT ME WTF. I know because his a guy bla. The point where he made my day today was the time after lunch, I waved at him then he wanted a high five buuuuut its not a high five its where you guys touch hands then one will do an arm wrestling battle haha. I told him "Wag mo lagyan ng pwersa!"  after he pretended to be weak, I beat him and I smiled yeah yeah too shallow. Speaking about this guy, there's just something with this guy that I just don't quite get. 

One time when we went to Jollibee from my friend's house, he said something weird "Mga tarantado magulang ko eh" I sort of want to take that back from him. It offended me for some reason though they are not my parents. Then one time, he asked who's my prom date and I said "secret" though I don't really have someone to go with.. stupid. I asked who's his prom date then he said he don't know and then I asked him "Sino ba balak mo?" then he said "Si Michelle Tiu balak ko" I pushed him jokingly because idk if its a joke or not. If you are wondering why I remember these scenarios in my head, it is simply because I CAN'T GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD. 

Time to explain

I've been on my other blog and I just want to talk about why I put "Determined to be an optimist" in my description. Tbh, I am a pessimist. Negative thoughts conquered my mind, there's no other thing I can do but to be depressed. This happened when I was 13. All my expectations lead to suicidal. Big word huh? It should be disappointments but it extends beyond that point. I don't know who to trust anymore. I don't know if my friends are true friends. My parents put all the blame on me. I don't have anyone to talk with my problems or even ask "Why are you sad?" no one did. I expected that this whole new level would be great because I'm entering the "teen" age and high school. I expected to have friends wherein you can be completely weird with. I expected that my family will be proud of me. I expected that I have a good relationship with my classmates. All of those things were the opposite. I was bullied, lonely, and depressed. No one cared. It was really painful when no one was there for you when you need help. I just want to die that time. Different scenarios were spinning around my head regarding suicide. I want to kill myself. I don't want to live my life anymore. As time goes by, I was happy that I survived. In my sophomore year, I gained friends. This time, they are the people who you can actually call "real friends". They are the best. My family problems lessened and throughout that year, my pessimist-ness vanished. All I can think of is happiness. Junior year is the stage where  negative thoughts is not a hinder to challenges. I am so glad that it turned out like this. Seriously. I am just thankful and blessed that this events happened in my life. 

Hullo

Pretty much abandoned this blog haha. Here's what happened from june-august:

JUNE:
• start of classes
• massive loads of hws, projects & reporting!
• the suffer guys and its just june

JULY:
• endless school works
• papa's bday!! :-)
• fuun

AUGUST:
• took the upcat
• science hates us
• seriously
• exams
• glad its over and fu k+12
• 4 sessions left in our review class!
• happy
• ustet is approaching
• college feels
• scary

August and september are busy months!! College exams month actually. Hoping to ace all of them tho. :) :)

Summer bliss

Hi guys!! Been a month now. Anyway, summer will come to an end soon and say hello to school once again. It has been so fast. I mean its like yesterday since we were freshmens and now, seniors. Can't believe we have pass through all the hard works in high school for 3 years!!

After the graduation, college. Geeez I'm way too much of a future person. Hahaha. This summer 2013 is one helluva summer. All the days are sure well spent! The beach, travel to different places, sleepless nights, that late convo you have with someone.. Damn! I don't want to end this ecstasy. Somebody, help me huhu oh and yeah, a selfie. Tried wearing my twin's glasses and I swear, I'll never going to wear them again!

Trouble

Hi guys! sorry for not being active for a month. A lot of things happened lately and some of it are good and some are bad. Let's start off with the good news, its summer! Beach, sleepless nights, sleep all day, yes. No more school. I just can't believe I had my first heart break. I don't know if it is a heart break or not... I'm not sure. I felt that every quotes that I see on tumblr about love and stuff. I felt that crazy butterflies clash around your stomach whenever that person talks to you and how happy that person was because that person heard your voice. I exp those sweet texts that person sends to you everyday. But it did not work out. I don't want to explain it any further hehehe. Happy summer! :)  

Baby you're a firework

The title is definitely relevant to this post. We went to MOA a while ago. We just roam around and blah. Someone gave us a flyer that its the 4th International Pyromusical Competition wherein competition of fireworks. Everything is unplanned though. Anyway, so we ended up buying tickets with dinner! Although we don't have the best table but its cool. :) After 7000 years, here are the images!! :) :) 

Btw, I don't know which is which. Taiwan or Spain. The images are sort of mixed up so.. 

not the best seat... 

I'm feeling 22

Hey guys! I bought these books last night. 'Cause I need something to read although I'm not done yet with Fifty Shades Freed and 300 pages left before it is done. Kidding! Basically, I just want to spend my spare time on reading books. For example, I'm done with Freed, no books to read after. I just you know.. got fond of reading.. and its fun. So I decided to buy those books. Well, I too have the same thing with drawing but not that much of an artist and yet too lazy to think what to draw. Hehe

Thinking 'bout you

Hey guys!! Its chill tuesday! :) We didn't do anything hectic today hehe! Its because my batch mates are getting ready for the Sage Election and as well the others are practicing for the Pisap--Sabayang Pagbigkas-- that they will compete to other schools tomorrow!! 1 month away and its officially summer! GAAAH Can't wait any longer. So I haven't been posting images lately and that's because my procrastination just occurs eventually especially uploading. I am sorry huhu :( I'll try my best though. :) 

Valentines

Today is our first day of exams. I am supposed to blog 'till saturday buuut thanks to Genyo, I've got to use the internet. Anyway, today was shocking. Its Valentines Day hence the title HAHA. This is really unexpected that someone gave me a rose and the rose is utterly beautiful. Our boys in our section was the mastermind behind it. They are the sweetest guys ever!! Each and every single girls in my section (including me) also received roses. Some got teddy bears, chocolates, a bouquet of roses. Thank you Vision boys for making this valentine a day to remember. ♥♥ 

A super late xmas gift from my bff, Gale. :) 

I was so stupid for letting you go

Its Valentines day tomorrow! A special day for those sweet couples who do sweet things. Its a special day for me too! Mastery exams and a date with fridge tomorrow. How cute. :) So obviously, I won't be posting stuffs 'till saturday. I'll make this day worth it and post a number of random/bored things later. Advance Happy Valentines Day!! xx 

This is start of something beautiful

So we went to a condo unit which is really not that far from home. The condo looks lovely, spacious and one hell of a prize. I convinced papa to don't spend so much money on it but he ignored it and ended up reserving it or lets just say, he did bought it. He had an instalment. So err yeah. After that, we headed northbound. To be specific, Nuvali. I don't have any clue why are we in there anyway. Papa was talking to a person and that person works for Avida Estates Nuvali. We are going to check out a house. There were two persons who were guiding us and we stopped by to an open area where there is a huge lake, a bike renting booth, it was a big place okay? Anyway, we rent on a bike. I MISS MY CHILDHOOD SO BAD. I asked papa why are we checking out a house if we already bought a condo unit? He bought a house too. 

Today was very tiring, shocking and... tiring. I really don't know if I am happy or sad of what papa did today. I mean, yeah he bought a condo and a house for us but isn't it too much? Too luxurious? But the way I look in his face, his happy. I shouldn't over think about this shocking revelation thing. When his happy, I'm happy too. I didn't took any images of where we went today because uhm, no reason hehehe. 

xx

Fartwork friday

I just goof around with some letters and this was the result. I am really no good at lettering but I am determined to improve it so... Oh yeah, its "Thinking About You" by Frank Ocean. Impressive song. :)

I'll pick you up when you're getting down

Hey guys! So last weekend was fantabulous. Breezing air, calm surrounding, smiling faces of my family, one of d best memory! Anyway, here are the images that I took during our stay in Tagaytay. :) 

I took that myself coz you know, i'm the photographer..

Stopped by at Nuvali hehe 

Mama. Being a model. 

Chillin' at Bo's Cafe.